Something’s Missing In My Life: Why Constant Seeking Only Hurts Us

Something’s Missing In My Life: Why Constant Seeking Only Hurts Us


Recently I was reminded of something very important, it is so simple yet most of us forget it on a daily basis, I know I did for a while. In a world where we are constantly trying to get somewhere and be someone, we become easily blinded to the reality: We are whole and we need not seek anything that isn’t already, because there isn’t anything missing. Yes… I know… This is an ethereal, and easier spoken than lived adage, but at the same time there is no simpler or more powerful truth.

No one is harder on you than you, no matter how much you are doing it is never enough, right? And when you aren’t doing enough you feel worthless. We get so caught up in the quest to accomplish our daily, yearly and overarching goals that we forget:  it is OK, we are OK; we don’t need to conquer ourselves or the world, today, we need only do our very best.

It is after the introduction of the intention with our conscious mind–doing our very best– that we can rest knowing that we are doing our very best, each and everyday, even if we don’t check that box on a daily basis.

Everything we are and everything we aren’t… Everything we believe we aren’t but we are… Everything we believe we are but we aren’t…Everything we don’t have that we want… It doesn’t matter… We must each recognize that right now, in this moment, we are whole. The saying/affirmation, I AM, holds this powerful self-knowledge within it’s letters. No matter what is missing externally or internally, accept it as part of who you are and where you are going. You are whole as you are, perceived flaws and all. There is nothing imperfect about you, because nothing and no one is perfect.

In my own life this battle of pursuit and seeking has risen from the depths for various different reasons. The desire to succeed, the fear to fail, the never-ending creative flow that is my life, and being vulnerably honest with you and I, the desire to be viewed well. When I did my own work and got to the heart of it, I was met with fear and only fear. I realized that I am terrified of failing. As if one day, say when I am 30 years old I will wake up and BOOM! I am a failed puzzle, missing pieces.

I realized that I was confining my life to what is now and what will be the end result of, now. But when I realized that I am whole right now, flaws and all, that nothing is missing and that I am doing my very best everyday to be the best I can be– no matter what others think or say– I know I am OK. I don’t need to seek anything outside of me because I know everything I am and need is within me, I need only believe it, trust it and live it… Rather than thinking and fearing something is missing and I need to get it.

Many of us without realizing it seek an unrealistic level of perfection from ourselves. We set the bar so high that we fear missing the mark while not realizing the mark is unrealistic. While I believe most things are possible and my bar of realistic is as high as anyone’s, I also believe that man can drive himself into self-destruction, depression and hate by being unrealistic with what he expects from himself.

Just because we know we are capable of it, doesn’t mean we need to accomplish it right this second.

I know, some of you reading the last paragraph might feel as I did when I first wrote those words: . Don’t get it twisted, we each must believe in ourselves and our dreams to the fullest extent, no matter how high and far reaching they are, and we each must pursue what feels right in our heart of hearts, and we each must work hard to learn and grow. But we must not forget that we are whole, right now, no exception, and that without those “things” we are still whole. Our lives won’t be miserable and we won’t be failures if we don’t accomplish it all by tomorrow or even next year, unless we deem ourselves so. Life is a journey and even though none of us know how long we have this go around, and I never suggest wasting time, I do suggest easing into your life and letting things unfold with the pace of nature. Have faith in the universe, have faith in the pace of life and have faith that who you are right now is more than enough.



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